Monday, December 31, 2012

The Worst Year

Go to Facebook. Go on. What do you see? I bet somewhere in your timeline is a post bemoaning 2012. A friend declaring their hatred of the last twelve months and happy that a new beginning is arriving with the coming of 2013.

I usually hate these posts. Time is a creation of humans to rationalise the chaos that is existence. How on Earth does changing your wall calender magically reboot your life in a positive note? Life, I've always thought, is what you make of it.

All that changed on May 3rd of this year when my workplace was seriously damaged by fire. Utterly out of my control I faced a limbo while decisions were made about how to move forward. We reopened but it was tentative steps. We were damaged and uncertainty hung over us everyday. This continued until 19th September when it was announced we were to be taken over by a national company.

I tried to stay positive. I knew I'd miss working for a family owned business but surely a national chain would bring stability and investment? Sure enough builders moved in on day one to repair the fire damage and give the building a much needed re-fresh.

Three months on and I hate it. A head office 200 or-so miles away just can't relate to our needs. Every day brings a fresh battle against red-tape and paperwork. Everything we do has to be justified to the point where it's holding us back.

The knock-on effect is evident too. Out of work I've little enthusiasm or positivity for anything right now, when I get home I just want to withdraw and spend time to myself which isn't good for my fiancee or son.

So yeah, good riddance 2012. Tomorrow I will return to work. A building that was once filled with fun and happiness but now just a shell to what was but I will return knowing only I can change things. That fresh new calendar on the wall is a line drawn under the past. A line to step over, a starting gun in the race to find happiness again. Bring on 2013.